


Glasses

by IRegretNothingAndEverything



Series: A Broken Bridge [1]
Category: Half Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware
Genre: Bubby doesn't say anything but he's there cause it's before the betrayal, gordon's glasses break, it's benrey bro, slight body horror, slight gore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-14
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:21:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25888750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IRegretNothingAndEverything/pseuds/IRegretNothingAndEverything
Summary: They had been through hell at this point, and Gordon was sure it was going to get worse than it was already, but... he tripped.
Series: A Broken Bridge [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1887160
Comments: 13
Kudos: 191





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Lil idea I had just cause!

One trip. That’s all it took. Gordon tripped once, and yeah, sure, it was hard standing back up in the HEV suit, heavy and overbearing as it was, but that wasn’t the point. His helmet had been taken off and left somewhere a long while back, and thus, when he tripped, and fell... his glasses came off. 

Shattered on the ground. 

He could see it, blurry as it was, and knew it a moment that there was no fixing it. Still, he shifted up, hand shaking as he picked up the frame, glass clinking against the concrete as he picked them up. One lens was completely gone, shattered on the ground, and the other was cracked horribly, spider webbed in a way that would just make it harder to see than if he didn’t wear them. 

So it was glasses. 

Everything that had piled up over time, the constant attacks from the group, the constant fight for his life, the HEV suit sitting on his shoulders like he was Atlas holding up the world, and it was his glasses breaking that set him off. 

God, it would have been so easy to ask someone to carry his spares for him, so easy to pluck them out of his locker and pass them off to someone who would be the least likely to break them, but he didn’t. Why hadn’t he?” 

“Mr. Freeman?” Tommy came up next to him, and Gordon realized he was still on the floor on his knees, holding his broken glasses frame in his hands, tears streaking down his face. They were behind him. They couldn’t see that behind him. He could save face here. 

“Uh just...” He cleared his throat, bringing his free hand up to wipe at his eyes, shaking his head. Fuck. “Broke my glasses is all.” He muttered, not wanting to see like a child. God, how pathetic was it, starting to cry over this? This was nothing compared to everything else he had faced this entire time, and yet here he was, on his knees crying over it. 

“Are you okay?” Tommy asked softly, and Gordon laughed softly, rubbing at his eyes. 

“Fine, fine, just... just trying to get used to the blurriness again.” Gordon muttered, shaking his head as he pushed himself to stand, still clutching the broken frame in his hand, still shaking. Fuck, it was just so stupid. So simple and yet, it broke him. 

He wouldn’t be able to aim properly anymore, he realized belatedly, and he laughed again, shoulders hunching and just... 

Gordon threw the frames against the wall. 

The glass in the one lens broke out of the frame finally, and one of the legs popped off, the screw rolling off into the cracks in the concrete, and Gordon laughed. Something so simple and it was going to fucking kill him, in the end. 

“Gordon, are you sure you’re alright?” Coomer was cautious, slowly moving up next to him, but Gordon flipped out his pistol, staring down at it for a moment, before continuing on, ignoring the tears streaking down his face leaving clean trails to mark their progress. 

It didn’t fucking matter anymore. If he was going to die, might as well die fighting. 

He didn’t notice the worried looks the others shot between each other, before they followed his lead, crushing the broken glass beneath their shoes as they walked.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhh... Benrey's here now!

None of them mentioned on Gordon’s wide shots. They didn’t say anything on his confusion on who was who when he looked at them from a bit further away. They said nothing on the frustration and anger he continued to hold back. If he wanted to pretend nothing was happening, more power to him. 

Benrey hadn’t been there. He had still been piecing himself together after dying, showing up again on the elevator. The problem with that was the Gordon didn’t seem to realize it was him at first, at least until he spoke. 

Gordon had just stepped towards the elevator, completely oblivious to who it was. The others clustered around him, and Coomer looked like he was prepared to grab Gordon. Benrey shot him a look, and, per usual, asked for Gordon’s passport. 

What he didn’t expect was to get the muzzle of a gun pressed against his cheek. 

“Move.” Gordon muttered, and Benrey took a step back, eyes wide. Gordon followed, stumbling a bit on the step into the lift, but keeping the gun pressed against his face. Coomer stepped on quickly behind Gordon, eyes darting between them quickly. 

“Uh... Mr. Freeman-” Tommy stopped himself, swallowing, before shaking his head, stepping on after them. Bubby just watched for a second, before Coomer yanked him onto the lift. 

“Bro... what’s with the gun?” Benrey asked, eyes darting from his hand, towards his face. Something was different. Something wasn’t quite right here. He squinted at Gordon for a moment, as the other didn’t answer, before it clicked. “Where’s you glasses?” 

It hurt a bit, being shot, but at the moment, he could handle it. Still, having a hole in his cheek made him from, hands coming up to the bullet wound. Gordon stared at him, eyes narrowed-no... not narrowed... Gordon was squinting at him, trying to see him right. Benrey looked at him a moment, before Gordon turned, getting off the lift as it settled on the next floor. 

Benrey watched him stumble on the lift step again, growl under his breath, before walking off towards the wall, leaning against it for a moment, eyes closed. One hand on his temple. Benrey glanced around at the others as his face pieced itself back together, blood dripping down his hand. “Uhh...” 

“Don’t... ask about the glasses.” Bubby said, looking over at him, one hand on his own glasses. “He’s not exactly doing alright. He tripped coming off one of the trains and they just... shattered on impact.” Benrey looked back to Gordon, as Coomer took the lead to get off the lift, moving over towards Gordon, Tommy followed, leaving Benrey and Bubby there for a second. 

“Is he okay?” Benrey asked softly, and Bubby sighed, shaking his head. 

“No... I don’t think so.” With that, Bubby stepped off, going over towards Tommy, who was peeking into the hallways. Benrey stood there a moment, eyes focused on Gordon. 

He was still leaning on the wall, rubbing his temple slowly, hands shaking. Even a bit far away, Benrey could see how much he was shaking. Coomer was talking to him softly, but still, Gordon would flinch when he spoke too loudly. Benrey wondered how he had handled the gunshot. 

Benrey stood there for a moment, before walking over towards them calmly, face coated in his own blood, though now it was back to normal. He stopped in front of Gordon, before singing softly, blue to green settling around Gordon’s head. 

Gordon paused, opening his eyes slightly to squint at Benrey. Neither of them said anything, and Tommy didn’t come over for a translation. Benrey didn’t think this one needed it. Gordon’s headache was disappearing, he could see it happening, as he relaxed, shoulders coming down from their tense position, hand still form where he had been rubbing his temple. 

They stared at each other for a moment, before Benrey grinned, blowing another shot of blue towards him, and Gordon huffed, waving it away. 

“Sorry for shooting you.” He muttered, and Benrey shrugged a shoulder, turning and walking away. Once out of sight, he slipped through the wall. 

He could get back to the locker room way quicker than they could. Gordon was bound to have a spare pair in his locker somewhere.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gordon without his glasses is far more stressed than Gordon with his glasses.


	3. Chapter 3

Benrey found them easily. The glasses, that is. They were just sitting innocently on the top shelf, right next to the photo of Joshua. Benrey stared at that photo for a moment, before grabbing the glasses, and, as a second thought, Gordon’s passport. He stared at that too, for a moment, before slipping both stolen items into his pocket. 

He had to phase back to Gordon, who, at this point, was in the back of the group again, squinting at things, with one of the others making sure to be planted near in front of him, so he didn’t try to shoot anything. Gordon took that at face value, holding his crowbar just in case anything slipped past them. Benrey slipped up behind him, following along 

It did get him a crowbar to the head, but it was alright. He had startled Gordon. Gordon just squint glared at him and continued on, pretending he didn’t stumble on a small step up. Benrey let him pretend. 

What Benrey really wanted was a good funny moment to give Gordon the spare glasses. He really wanted that. Still, watching Gordon get more and more upset with the simple things, Benrey began to feel bad about it. He had the key to fixing Gordon’s issues, and Gordon continued to suffer. 

Eventually, after another encounter that had Gordon near tears, Benrey sighed rather loudly, then slipped through the wall so he wasn’t there when Gordon turned to snark at him. He watched Gordon pause for a moment, before shaking his head slightly, wiping at his eyes. Benrey nodded slightly, before slipping back out on Gordon’s other side and holding out the glasses. 

Gordon turned, jumping slightly then squinting at him. “What?” 

“Take ‘em.” Benrey muttered, shaking the glasses slightly. Gordon looked down, carefully taking them out of Benrey’s hand. Benrey made note how he held them, just for future reference, before slipping them on. 

He blinked a few times, before sighing softly. “Thanks Benrey.” He mumbled, hand coming up to pat Benrey’s shoulder as he passed, just looking tired now. 

Benrey was... confused to say the least. He had hoped maybe that it would be better? That Gordon would feel better? But Gordon seemed just as upset and tired as before. It didn’t make any sense. Benrey watched him round the corner to the others and growled, trying to act like he wasn’t about to throw a tantrum. 

He had made it better, so why didn’t he act like it was better?


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was gonna make this a longer fic, but I feel like it's moved past the whole 'gordon breaks his glasses' thing, so this'll be the end of this fic, but maybe? another series? Because of course that's what I would do here skldfnwirno

They had settled down for the night, Tommy curled up in a corner with Bubby and Coomer in the opposite corner of their room. Benrey stood near the door, staring absently at the wall, or rather through it, as Gordon was sitting near his feet. Neither of them mentioned the other, as Gordon stared down at his hands quietly, silent. It was vaguely uncomfortable, but Benrey wasn’t about to change that.   
Gordon, apparently, had a different idea, as he slipped off his glasses and tapped Benrey’s shin with one hand. He held them up to Benrey when he looked down. Benrey just stared a moment, before Gordon sighed. “Look, can you hold them for that night? I can’t sleep with them on, and if I take them off I’m going to lose them, and I just. I don’t wanna do that again.” 

Benrey was silent, before delicately taking the glasses from him, holding them carefully. He paused, looking down at them for a moment, before slipping them into his pocket with Gordon’s passport, which he still had no real idea what to do with. Gordon muttered a thanks, shifting to lay down. 

“Hey uh...” Gordon didn’t say anything, but froze half way to laying down, squinting up at Benrey, who had moved his gaze back to the wall, still staring past it. “Why didn’t it get better?” 

“What?” 

“I... I fixed it, so I thought it would all get better.” Benrey shrugged a shoulder, frowning slightly. “Broke your glasses being a little clumsy boy, so I fixed it and got them back, but you weren’t better.” 

Gordon shifted, sitting up again, but tugging at Benrey’s sleeve. He paused, before sliding down to sit next to him, Gordon shifted to get more comfortable there. They were silent a moment, but Benrey could tell he was trying to think of a way to word it. 

“Is that... not what happens?” He elaborated a bit more, hoping that maybe, he could get this out without having to resort to sweet voice, a mode of communication he would need to wake up Tommy to effectively use. 

“I...” Gordon sighed softly, leaning his head back against the wall, eyes closed. “So, uh... you can pile a lot of shit onto a bridge right? But they’ve got weight limits, and when you start pushing past that, it starts getting unstable, but maybe it can hold up a bit more, until you add just a bit more, and the whole thing breaks. My glasses breaking was that moment that just... sent all the other shit tumbling into the water below.” 

Benrey blinked slowly, turning his head properly to look at Gordon, who was frowning, or grimacing, really. They were silent, as Benrey worked through what he had said, before nodding. 

“You can’t fix the bridge... by uh, removing that weight... if it’s already come down?” He asked, trying to clarify. Humans were... confusing at best, as he really did want to understand what was going on in Gordon’s head, at least a bit more. Thankfully, Gordon nodded. 

“It’s already broken. Taking away the weight that broke it won’t magically reverse the damage it did. I... it sounds stupid, getting so upset over something so simple, but...” 

Benrey hummed softly, color lighting up his throat as blue filtered around him slowly. Gordon slowly opened his eyes to focus on the color, and even cracked a smile at it. 

“It’s just. The last bit of it. If it were just the glasses? I would’ve laughed it off. But it’s not just the glasses. It was never just the glasses. So, I really do appreciate you going back and grabbing them, however you did that, however you got there and back so fast, I don’t really care that much, but it was just taking the barest weight off the already broken bridge. As much as I wish that was how it works, it’s just... not fixed.” 

He let the blue dissipate around him, the room going dark again, before nodding slightly. Humans were still confusing, but breaking things and being unable to fix them was something that Benrey was well versed in at this point. 

Gordon was silent next to him, and when Benrey glanced over, he found Gordon drifting off, head slowly sagging to one side, settling on his shoulder. Benrey didn’t move, didn’t say anything, just looked at him a moment, before pulling Gordon’s passport out of his pocket and setting in carefully on Gordon’s lap as he slept. He didn’t move, however. Gordon needed the sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyways.... Benrey care Gordon folks.

**Author's Note:**

> Might do more? I dunno.


End file.
